The Story of Buddy

Let me tell you the story of Buddy. Most children have either had a Buddy or known a friend with Buddy.

Buddy is friendly-looking doll, often with a welcoming smile and big (usually blue) eyes that gaze innocently forward and that attempt to hide the fact that Buddy is PURE EVIL.

You may have heard of a rather well-known cousin of Buddy, Chucky.

Now, nobody truly knows what it is that makes these dolls so evil. Perhaps some, like Chucky, are possessed. Perhaps some are the result of juju, perhaps they have been in the possession of a less-than-stellar-hearted child. But there are a few things that all of these dolls hold in common, whatever teh cause.

The first is the inability to get rid of them. Garage sales, hiding him in closets, throwing him away... somehow he always turns up, grinning as brilliantly as ever, and as sinfully as ever.
Second is the wicked aura. You can't quite place it, but there’s something wrong about him. Something that makes you shiver involuntarily, something that causes dishes to break, people to trip, the dog to bark.

Buddy happens to be Blair and Ross’ evil doll. From before they moved to Ontario he has terrorized them, evading all attempts to dispose of him and spreading his evil charm everywhere. From the time Ross and Blair can remember, he’s been there, and since roughly a week after 5-year old Ross received him as a well-intentioned gift, the two of them have feared him and have been trying to get rid of him.

Even when they most recently moved, he was left behind in the old house only to reappear (ever-smiling) in the spare room.

Blair was explaining Buddy to the Ladies over coffee. Anne was also there, listening with an indulgent smile on her face as Blair expounded the longstanding reign of terror the doll has had over her and her brother. And, as Blair turned to her for confirmation of her description, she exclaimed:

“I thought Ross loved that doll! I’ve been bringing him everywhere and I always make sure to put him on Ross’ bed for when he comes home. Whoops!”

-dies laughing-

Oh my God, no wonder he’s so terrorized every time.

Simple (albeit very longstanding) misunderstanding?

Or has the doll been subtly influencing? Controlling, even?

I’ll let you decide.

Oh, and if your Buddy happens to be a ginger, BURN HIM!!! BURNNNN HIMMMMM!!!!! Don’t even risk it!!!

Lah.